Last night I went with some friends of mine up to Mary’s Peak. At 4000 feet it can’t really be called a mountain but it is the highest point on the coastal range so we take what we can get. As the sunset died, large chunks of cloud gusted over the peak. At one moment the brilliant mango and navy blue of the sky was clear as anything and the next it was completely obscured by fog. Over the past few months my vision for the coming year has alternated between crisp and muddled.
It was very clear when I set my sights on Kenya. I knew that I was called to the brokenness I saw in Maai Mahiu. God has laid places of darkness and hopelessness on my heart. I could see Him very plainly guiding me to Kenya.
It was hazy about a month ago when I got the call that I would not be able to get a visa for Kenya anytime in the foreseeable future. I would have to look for other options with AIM. I was in a fog. It seemed God was closing a door but it wasn’t until last week that I saw another one opening. (We are such impatient creatures anyway: Jacob labored fourteen years for his wife and I have a hard time sitting through a lengthy television commercial)
Soon I will be going with AIM to Nicaragua. In Sept I will head down for a week to meet the people I will stay with and see if it’s a good fit. Then I will return to raise funds and finish packing. My initial commitment is for a year but I will stay as long as the Lord leads.
The foggy times are difficult. They make you question if God is really in control of everything. But in the end they make you stronger and more sure of your Leader. I want to be exactly where God wants me to be which is why I am grateful for circumstances that push me to trust. I look forward to an entire year of intermittent fog with moments of brilliant clarity as I learn to follow the leading of the Lord. Thank you for your prayers. I will continue to need them as I set out on the next step.
